Going Home. My Travels Are Over.

After a lot of soul searching, I’ve decided to call it quits on my journey. Two years is enough for anyone, and I think I’ve had my fill of the world. I’ve purchased a ticket back to the USA for tonight and this is going to be my last post on my blog.

The fact is, traveling hasn’t made me a more worldly person. If anything, I hate more types of people now more than ever. I have truly come to hate people of all races, creeds, and ethnicity. I hate their food, I hate their dress, I hate the way they don’t speak American, I hate their TV shows, I hate cricket, I hate rugby, and I really hate soccer. I hate squat toilets, I hate chopsticks, I hate the rainforest, and I hate the desert.

The thing that really pushed me over the top was something which happened last night. I met this guy by the name of Roy DeWitt.

Continue reading…

42 thoughts on “Going Home. My Travels Are Over.”

  1. HAHA! Stumbled upon your site as im interested in travelling and thought… Wow, look at this guy, what a role model for my future travels! Then i read the ‘going home’ headline. Glad its a prank ;)

  2. Ah, jeez – I was SO ready to read about Roy DeWitt’s annoying behavior that drove you over the edge … LMAO

  3. Sorry, I knew it was bogus. However, if you happened to have new readers to the site today and they read that, you might actually lose readers because they aren’t familiar with you and your site already.

  4. Ok, now I’m confused . . . which part wasn’t true – the part about you going home? or the part about traveling around the world hasn’t made you a more wordly person? or all of it?

  5. Ha! Nice job. I can’t believe I fell for that.

    I was reading it all pissed off – “I just sent this blog to my Israeli friend and now this guy’s turned into a total asshole, wtf?”

    • Ditto with me, shocked. But only for some 10 secs. Good try.
      May you be the inspiration for thousands, young or old.

  6. I traveled for almost 2 years too. and it did make me more worldly, but when i came back, i wanted to live soooooo much differently than the poor, go for opportunities that a lot of people don’t have. and, by the way, after 1.5 years i was just plain tired of travel! Now, I prefer month sprints, rather than very long term.
    The Travel Expert(a) and an Expat with a Twist

  7. Yours was the only April Fool’s Joke that I halfway believed. I thought, “Wow…what sent this guy over the edge.” Nice one. Thanks for my morning smile.

  8. …I hate reading about your boring travels and i hate your website…

    good one! April Fools! (i hope)

  9. Sorry to hear you’ve decided to go home, in a way – your posts and pictures have been quite interesting to look at. One thing though – when I tried to “continue reading” this last post, the link I click takes me to a YouTube “Rock ‘n Rolla” video.

  10. I think I’m the most gullible person in the world. Still wondering if this is a joke? Happy April Fool’s!!

  11. Terrible! How could you?!

    Man, I hate April Fools’ Day. Probably just because I’m so gullible. :)

  12. “I hate the cricket, I hate the rugby, …”
    “I hate the whole world, and all its crazy things”

    I’m sure there’s a song in there somewhere. ;)

  13. You magnificent bastard is right. I’m not awake enough to see this coming. I was surprised, because this didn’t sound like you, but didn’t see it coming.

    That’s it, I don’t read your blog before 8am anymore.

  14. I started following you on twitter, and I just loved what you are doing here. Had it not been an April Fool’s attempt, I would’ve been majorly disappointed. I was especially shocked at the hate you projected.. the funny thing is, I was already looking at different April Fool’s gimmicks that different companies pulled off (and are still pulling off).. :) All the best, Gary.

  15. You are a cheeky, wayward, PITA head! Pure evil drips from your purile viens. Thank heavens you are too twisted for words. I look forward to your madness man! Safe journeys!~Stacey

  16. Gary,

    We’re ALL glad you’ve decided to make this monumental decision!!!!!!! Your paltry drivel has sucked WAY too much time out of the world, you vampire you, and meeting Roy DeWitt is your karmic reward!!! Hope you two will be very happy together…

    Happy April Fools Day!!

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